WTWBG!

I've fallen into a bad habit. I read the book and then blog on it weeks later. Fortunately, Welcome to the World, Baby Girl is one of my favorite all-time books, so I'll have better recollections of this one.

First of all, I really have enjoyed reading what you all think of this book. I read it sometimes when I am feeling lonely and want to be wrapped in the warm, comfy blanket Katie spoke of. I, too, love that little town of Elmwood Springs.

Flagg's storytelling is impeccable. It's funny. It's clever. It's fast. Her characters are well-drawn, likable, real (though slightly caricatured, the "villains" especially). Her humor runs through the book in unexpected places: the Valentines pull-over scene, for one. Aunt Elner had me in stitches all the time. Flagg also has a knack for tugging at heartstrings: the description of everyone praying for Dena when she was in the hospital built up and up until there was Aunt Elner, telling God that she didn't have anything to do and He could take her instead of Dena. Another tearful scene came when little Macky Warren had to knock on the door to tell Mrs. Nordstrom that she had a telegram, informing her of her son's death. Finally, there is Dena's own mother in the bathtub, looking for that one drop of blood. How lonely, how sad.

I guess that brings me to Dena's secret history. I sometimes skip over the chapter that describes her grandfather telling the employment agent that he has some Negro blood. I just can't stand it. I want him to take it back, to try again, to come back and give a false name. To "Apple Z" that day. It's such a petty, man-made thing. Hate. Prejudice. But, as I said, man-made. We are (wo)men. We are imperfect. Along with our prejudice and injustice there is compassion and hope. We can be the worst and we can be the best, but mostly I guess we're all just in between. Flagg just proves again without the one end of the spectrum there can not be the other.

This book is a book of contrasts. Flagg portrays her characters as almost opposites: Howard Kingsley vs. Sidney Capello, Dena and Neighbor Dorothy, to an extent. Even the setting. Neighbor Dorothy's house with its expansive back yard, her wraparound front porch, all the visitors stands in opposition to the sterility of the apartment buildings Dena grows up in.

The healing powers of this town play an enormous role in the story. When Dena is sick, she comes "home" to Missouri to become well. It's not only the slow and gentle pace of the town that cares for her. It's those warm, silly, friendly, lovable, capable people in the town, too. "Poor Tot" brings over food. Aunt Elner has stories of Dena's father, Gene. Macky offers hardware, Norma fluttering attention. These people surround Dena with all the love they had for her father, and she just soaks it all in. Her soul soaks it in. This town saves her life. Perhaps that's why I love this book so much - it feeds my soul as well as Dena's.

I'm glad you all could share this book with me.

Congrats to Laurenda and family

On Wednesday, August 6th, Laurenda gave birth to her fourth daughter, Quinlyn Taylor. Mother and daughter are doing well. Best wishes from Les Liseuses - we still expect a Northanger Abbey post, though. :-)

Laurenda's oldest and youngest daughters

Welcome to the World, Baby Girl

Sometimes I had hard time believing Dena's character. Her thoughts and attitudes about life were so different/so in conflict with the way that other people saw her. She didn't hide those attitudes and was terrible to waiters and others. I thought her behavior was pretty scandalous and I was surprised that it wasn't an issue for her because she was a media darling. I guess that just shows how the gossip shows have taken off that I expect that behavior to damage her career. I was surprised that they had to dig for dirt on her, I thought she was providing enough dirt with her alcoholism and her attitude toward others. She was lucky to have people who loved her so unconditionally 'cause she was pretty much a stinker. I just found it hard to believe that people couldn't see her detachment and hatred for others more clearly. But I guess that's where the detachment comes in- she didn't let anyone get close enough to see who she was and she was very skilled at being polite.

I liked that in this book we got to see her change gradually. I think Crow Lake was a little harder to relate to because Kate didn't get her wake up moment until the end of the book. We didn't get to see Kate change. The book at least ended with the hope that she would but most of the book was her narrating her detached self and she was harder to like. Dena was more vulnerable from the beginning and her conversations with Sookie highlighted her changing.

When I first started reading about neighbor Dorothy I thought of blogging. It's the whole new form of radio. It connects people in all the little corners of the world. It was interesting how the book didn't feel dated to me even though it was set in the seventies and the technology is so different now.

I was glad to see things come full circle and how Dena embraced her family at the end. I felt bad for her Grandparents that they missed out on it. I bawled when I read about her mom accidentally committing suicide half way around the world away from her baby girl. I love that Aunt Elner found that picture of Dena's mom holding her with love in her eyes. I'm glad that she could remember her new mom with that piece added.

I think I have more to say but I want to post this and my two year old wants to play a game. :) so... I will post and just have to comment later...

Welcome to the World, Baby Girl!

Ladies,

I have loved reading your comments. I agree with all y'all about Dena's lack of self-awareness ("she is so shut down" just like Kate in Crow Lake) and the importance of turning-points in our lives (again like Crow Lake). I loved the prayers and faith and small town goodness that filled the book. I also loved the characters. I laughed so hard in various scenes that Rod would look at me to see what was so funny :) Fannie Flagg definitely has a gift! I had to call my son, Eric, the policeman to read the scene (pages 190-195) when Gerry was pulled over by the Highway Patrolman. I could hardly get through it :) And I loved how it came back it to play at the end of the book when Gerry sends a memo to Officer Childress with the "rest of the story." (pages 389-390)

On a more serious note, I realized that one of the overarching themes of the book was "truth" -- what is it? who has it? what are its ramifications? what happens to liars? what are the ramifications of their lies? Dena is such a liar at the beginning of the book. I don't think she ever thought about the fact that she was lying. The Paparazzi were supposedly reporting the "truth," but they were liars, too. I also was sickened by the realization that our society IS in a feeding frenzy for the WORST in people and people's lives are destroyed by lies and innuendo. An untrue accusation is damaging and so is the truth, particularly when it is misrepresented.

Flagg also demonstrates that people like Dena's boss, Ira Wallace, and the scum bag he worked with, Sidney Capello, (I thought his death was soooo poetic) and Julian Amsley, president of the network, can't stand anyone being better than they are so they have to drag them down somehow. It is so sad! I guess it's an extreme example of the "natural man." The irony of Dena trying so hard to become an "investigative reporter" when that was exactly what had destroyed her mother and her mother's family was huge!

One other thing I wanted to comment on is the plot. I actually thought that somehow Dena's mother was going to end up being part of the Rosemond family that Sidney Capello destroyed. At first, I was underwhelmed when I found out that her mother was living in hiding because she was African-American because I thought that wasn't awful enough. Hopefully, that shows that we have come a long way as a result of the Civil Rights movement. I have African and African American friends, as well as students, that are wonderful. However, when I put myself back in that era, I could see how devastating the "N" was. I felt such a great sadness for Theo and "Marion."

One question . . . Did I miss this? How did Dena live as a 15-year-old with no mother? Who paid for school? Why didn't someone report her mother as missing? Who paid the rent on the apartment? Dena didn't pose for the magazine until she was 17, right? How did she register for school, travel, etc.? Just wondering . . .

Loved the book!!

Welcome to the World!

Firstly, let me just say that I'm loving the look of our reading group blog! So cute! Thanks Katie. :)

Secondly, I actually read the book! Wahoo. For me, getting into the story was kinda like getting into a swimming pool. I stuck my toe in, found it was kinda chilly, but eventually ended up just jumping in the deep end and ended up feeling refreshed and glad I did. Translated: I started the book and liked it but thought, goodness, this is slow going. So I read the end and I was like, Wait, Why is Dena hooking up with the psychiatrist? Which let me to the middle of the book (with Tennessee Williams) and that got me to go back and pick up where I had left off and then I read the rest of it, completely engrossed.

Conclusion: I really really enjoyed this book!!!! It took a while to unveil the mystery, but I thought it was fascinating. I had NO CLUE that was where everything was headed, did you? The conclusion with Marion and Theo was incredibly sad--I can't even imagine what that life must have been like, but I was so happy that Dena's character was finally able to find peace...literally and figuratively...in her life by "returning home," where she was LOVED LOVED LOVED unconditionally. The very best type of "rescue."

There were two parts of the book that really had an impact on me. Clearly the chapter where she goes to "interview" Tennessee Williams...I found this so profound, considering that "Welcome" was published in 1998/99 (I can't remember exactly), set in the 70's (-ish), but being read in 2008 and it made me totally think about the feeding frenzy we are experiencing now with all the "Brittany" "Brangelina" "Whomever is current" gossip and hounding. Even the political scene is all about digging and finding the most horrid and terrible things about people and "exposing" them, all in the name of "news". I thought the discussion was very candid and rang true for so many things concerning that "whore fame" where you are at one moment running towards it and then frantically trying to run from it.

The other part that had a huge impact on me was when Dena is in the hospital, trying to recover from her bleeding ulcer that nigh unto killed her, and the story tells of how she had this very diverse but incredibly large group of people praying for her all around the world. That totally had me in tears. And I love Aunt Elner's prayer of "I'm not busy and I'd love to finally see you, so take me instead." Ugh! I'm getting teary-eyed thinking of it again.

I love that no one was perfect in this book, but all these characters seemed very human and quite possibly, someone you'd meet (or have met!). I really liked it. Thanks for suggesting it!!!!

:) Laurenda

Welcome to the World

Reading this book was like being wrapped in a comfy blanket in front of a roaring fire (in the winter, or course – this would be terribly uncomfortable in the summer). I had no idea where the story was going to take me. It was like I bought a train ticket for an unknown destination – but thoroughly enjoyed the journey.

Sometimes I really think I should live in a small town. But would I miss Barnes and Noble or DSW too much?

Although Danielle P. chose Welcome to the World as a “light” choice (after Crow Lake and The Kite Runner), it made me more introspectional (yes, that’s actually a word, according to dictionary.com, anyway) than even Crow Lake. And the parts of the book that caused this self-examination weren’t necessarily main parts of the plot:

During a conversation between Neighbor Dorothy and her daughter, Anna Lee, Anna Lee asks “Mother,” Anna Lee asked, “if you could stop time, when would you stop it?” Although I thought of a time or two where I would have liked to stop time, Mother Smith’s response to the question was amazingly wise: “…I don’t think I would…I’d hate to take a chance on missing something good that might be coming up, just around the corner, wouldn’t you?” (pg. xxvi)

Aunt Elner (loved her) asks Macky “What would you do if you knew for sure the end of the world was coming next Tuesday?” (pg. 61) What would I do? Would I be closed off to family and friends knowing that the end was near? Or would I try to be as happy, friendly and loving as possible. And, really, since I don’t know when my “end” will be, shouldn’t I live that way all the time?

During one of Dena’s sessions with Gerry O’Malley (what a patient guy), he asks her, “Who are you other than what you do…I’m not saying that other people may not be able to separate you from what you do, I’m wondering if you can.” (pg. 130) Dena’s put in a similar situation when Dr. Diggers asks her to describe herself in three words. Who am I? How would I describe myself? And closely would that match how other people describe me?
And then, later in the book, Dena finds herself: “Slowly [Dena] was beginning to feel like the girl she used to be, the one that had gotten lost along the way.” (pg. 376) Dena then quits the network – the only thing that had previously defined her was no longer needed as she discovered who she really was.

During a visit with Sookie (I think Sookie is Dena’s touchstone), Dena asks her what she would be willing to fight for (pg. 189).

Believe it or not, there was a theme in Welcome to the World that we previously touched on in Crow Lake – OK, in reading the previous posts for Crow Lake, it looks like it’s a theme that I touched on. What does that say about me? Anyway, it’s “how a single choice can change the direction of not only an individual’s life, but the lives surrounding that individual as well.” The choice in Welcome to the World was made by Dr. James Le Guarde. It wasn’t a wrong choice, it was just a choice with long-reaching consequences. When he was applying for a work permit and got the “N” stamped on it for Negro. Had it not been for that, how different would his life have been? His children’s? His grandchild (Dena)? This is not to say that Dena’s mother, could not have made different choices in her life – Dena did – but “that one second, that one letter, changed the course of [Dr. Le Guarde’s] life, and of his children’s lives.” (pg. 412)

What a wonderful adventure.

Crow Lake ... finally

I finally have a chance to post on Crow Lake. In short, I liked the story although I don't think I'd ever go in for seconds. I finished the book about a month ago, so this review will be a little sketchy. I will try to do my best.

Crow Lake did not leave a lasting impression. As I think back on it, there is nothing that stands out. I felt no great loss or sadness, nor happiness or joy. The storyline was interesting enough for me, but it did not resonate with me. This is due, in part, to my lack of connection to the main character, Kate. Because her adult self was hard to reach in the story -- even for her boyfriend -- I was not pulled in to her emotions.

When I first started reading the book, I anticipated being pulled in deep emotionally. The narrator kept referring to a tragedy that was to occur later. It sounded so ominous. There was a lot of buildup. Even when a tragedy -- her parents' death -- occurred, I kept waiting for something more to happen. Although Kate may have also been referring to the tragedy of her brother, Matt, not being able to attend school, this still did not seem to tragic to me. After meeting him, he seemed happy with his life.

I guess this brings another couple of points: 1) We are all responsible for our own happiness and 2) What is tragic to one is not tragic to another. Kate in the book was very wrapped up in her brother Matt's happiness. I think her teacher, Miss Carrington, fueled this concern: The teacher would come by the house to tell the family that it "wasn't too late" for Matt to attend college. For a 6-year-old, a teacher can be very influential. As for the tragedy of Matt not going to college, in the end, Matt made his own choices. He seemed to have decided that not attending college was not a tragedy. He and his other brother also sacrificed for Kate herself.

Kate's perspective of the events during her childhood were very different from her brothers' perspective. It's that shade of childhood that comes down over what's really happening. Kids can't know what's going on in the adult world. Kate seemed to be stuck with this shade down for most of her early adulthood, too. I am glad it began to lift as she visited her family in the last scenes.

Crow Lake - Gina's Perspective

I feel like the odd ball a lot of times because I don't like a book and the rest of you do. Maybe I took too long to read it, but I had to put the book down whenever Kate would move to the present day and her issues with Daniel - it bored me. I'd rather get lost in Crow Lake with the Morrison family and the small town idiosyncrasies.

I didn't relate to Kate at all in this story. I think I had the same disconnect with The Book Thief because Death was the narrator... not a happy soul. Same story in The Stranger. The narrator is so important to me. If I don't see eye to eye with the story teller, I have a hard time enjoying a book.

However I did relate to Aunt Annie, Matt, Luke and poor Marie. I was so proud of Marie for giving it to Kate at the end of the book. It was about time someone COMMUNICATED! I actually enjoyed Kate's shock and horror. It's really sad it took her so many years to re-think her attitude and open her heart.

Before I push "publish post" I need to mention a few quotes that I liked in the book:

"I remember it because both it (the juvenile wave) and her smile contrasted oddly with the fact that there were tears running down her cheeks. Take no notice of the tears, her smile and her fingers said. So we took no notice of them, as if they were nothing to do with Aunt Annie, and waved gravely back" (I saw myself as Annie in this scene... I'd be worried to death for those kids to be left on their own. I was releived that Kate actually wrote to Annie every week. I am sure it put her heart at ease.)

"Daniel is naive in some ways. He hasn't had to struggle for anything in life and that has made him easygoing. Undemanding. Not so much of himself as of other people. He is generous and fair and tolerant, all of which are qualities I admire, but sometimes I think he carries them too far. Sometimes he makes excuses for people in a way which almost denies them responsibility for themselves. ... The idea that we are carried along by fate, unable to resist or change direction, sound suspiciouly like an excues to me." (I loved this quote because Kate is my husband and I am Daniel in this situation. Just struck me interesting.)

"Because in an ideal world, effort, like virtue, is rewarded, and it simply makes no sense not to act as if it's an ideal world." (Beautifully written.)

Crow Lake

I too loved this book. My mom's book club read it and she recommended it to me. Thanks for your comments Katie, connecting it with The Kite Runner. I had realized how similar in structure the books were until you tied them together- both hinge on one life altering decision made in childhood, both end with hope but not a complete resolution, both are fictional biographies. Their settings and characters were so different that I hadn't connected them but really in the humanity of their tales they are very connected.

I think Marie gets a bad rap from Kate. Kate sees her as purely horrible but that's because she is the one who takes away her brother and hero from her. She is so jealous of Marie that she can't see Matt's true feelings for her. I'm not sure that Matt didn't love Marie(though I'm not sure that he did either- he was definitely in a vulnerable position). He certainly acted like it- He burnt down the barn and filled in the quarry that held such terrible memories for her. He couldn't take her away from it completely but he gave her as much of a clean slate as he could. I imagine that he adjusted to the situation pretty fast. He was a smart enough guy to make the best of it too. He may not have gotten to study biology like Kate but he got to live immersed in it everyday. It seems that he was a man to surround himself with learning whether in school or not. He didn't teach Kate from books- he taught her from life. His only failing was in Kate's eyes not in real life. I was sad that they didn't seem to have anymore kids.

I loved Luke too and I had hoped that he would marry once his siblings were grown. I was happy that he became very successful. I loved the way that the author brought you up to date on everyone's lives at the end with out it being a summary epilogue. The way she did it was necessary for the plot and perfect for the ending of the book. I just like that we got to see all of our favorite characters one last time- in the present and it made sense in the context of the book to do that. Hope I make sense- I've got mommy brain. :)

I wish that I could find out what happened to the other Pyes that walked off of the farm. I wonder if they stopped the cycle of abuse. Maybe the cycle only continued with the one that stayed behind because the one that stayed was the one who wasn't brave enough or was too greedy to leave. They also endured the most abuse because they stayed. The story of the one Pye who ran away after falling into the pond terrrified me. I kept expecting her to say that they found his body somewhere when the snow thawed in the spring. When she didn't I had hope that maybe he made it to somewhere... So sad to think of an 11 year old boy journeying off in the snow soaking wet. I hope he had somewhere to go to warm up first...

I loved their community and the way that they banded to keep their little family together and safe. I loved the lady who came over to cook/clean/and babysit. I can't remember her name at the moment. She was amazing. I love that all charity to them had to be given in a certain way in order for the boys to be willing to accept it. They still had to have some control and while they needed help and accepted help it was on their own terms. I wished that the Pyes had had more of that community interference. I think that because they were a successful and seemingly whole family, people respected their privacy and kept their distance. They were the real tragedy.

It is interesting the assumptions we make about ourselves and the way that they lock us into place. Kate assumed that she could never love anyone. She assumed that she needed to go away to school to be a success for the family. She assumed that she had to lock herself away from people so that she wouldn't hurt again. Daniel made her see that she could love. She was a success and she loved what she studied but she also let it remove her from her family. She let that prize divide her from her love. Finally she realized in the end that her hurting was caused by locking herself away. I am thankful for the surprises in life that knock us out of our assumptions and help us to open up.

Crow Lake

I'm finally getting around to posting on a book that I thoroughly enjoyed. I believe that everyone else does such a fantastic job of sharing their views and thoughts about the books that we read, that I usually only want to comment on what others have written. I'm such a lazy bum.

I too must admit that Luke was my favorite character. I related to and admired his optimism that everything would turn out all right. He never seemed to doubt, or get overly anxious about the future. My mother is a true optimist, and having married into a somewhat pessimistic family, I'm so grateful that that quality that my mother possessed became and integral part of my personality. It make the trials easier to bear. I wonder, though, about his decision to sacrifice his opportunity to go to teachers college in order to keep the family together. Was it a purely selfless act, or was it really not much of a sacrifice? How much did he really want to become a teacher? The fact that he was so young makes me wonder if he really understood what was involved in providing physical and emotional support to children. I in no way want to insinuate that his sacrifice was insignificant in any way considering that I'm not sure that I would have been selfless enough to choose to take charge of my 2 year old sister at the age of 18. I just wonder if his choice was a bit naive or perhaps an attempt to make up for the distress that he had caused his parents through his moments of rebellion. I was saddened that he had not married and had his own children, but happy that he had found a skill that he was good at (furniture making) that provided him with a sense of accomplishment, and self satisfaction.

I spent most of the book wondering why Kate should have such a big chip on her shoulder. It did cause me to do some self evaluating and soul searching to find the personal demons that keep me from the more meaningful relationships that I could be enjoying with my friends and family members.

With Matt I was reminded of how life altering one pivotal moment can be. In a split second he made a decision that forever changed the path his life would take. I wondered if he would somehow find a way to take Marie with him and still attend school. I'm sure that in that day and age (What era was it anyway? I wondered that the whole book. Did it ever say?), and under the circumstances, that was nearly impossible.

I really thought that Laurie would eventually kill his father, they'd destroy all evidence, and the Pyes would somehow work things out. I wasn't worried about jail time for Laurie mostly because it just wouldn't be fair to be punished for ridding the world of such rubbish. My guess is though, that Laurie may have eventually grown and continued the cycle with his own son. The author really did know the best way to resolve the Pye dilemma.

Thanks for such a good book choice!

Crow Lake

What a great book! I really enjoyed reading something set in Canada (part of my curriculum). I am very glad it was our June selection! I think Katie did a great job of discussing the turning points in the book, so I have decided to focus on the growth of the main character, Kate, and the beauty of the ending to the story.

I think the most telling line for me was on page 149 when Daniel asks her, "Does the word empathy mean anything to you, Kate?" I think there is a great deal of justification for her lack of empathy: her age when her parents are killed; the lack of discussion of feelings in her family / community; the fact that she is raised by brothers who really don't have a handle on their own emotions, let alone hers; and the "pull yourself up by the bootstraps and move on" era / society in which she was raised.

She reminds me of a PTSD (post-traumatic-stress-disorder) Vietnam veteran. It's as if her emotional development is stopped at the time of the accident and she is frozen until her conversation with Marie finally gets her to break loose and see things from a different perspective. That is the beauty of the ending of the book. The healing process has been going on for years for the others, and finally the healing process begins for Kate.

I, like Katie, thought that Laurie was going to kill his father and go to prison for it. I could only see doom and gloom in the Pye family future. I thought Lawson's ending was so much better than that! It was almost poetic. Calvin Pye had been destroying everyone around him for years. I know he was also a victim, but his final self-destructive act ended the cycle of abuse and allowed Matt and Marie a chance to have a decent life together. Because they inherited the farm without anyone there to drag them back into the pain of the past, their son, Simon, has a life full of love and future full of promise.

Thanks again for the opportunity to read a thought provoking book!

Crow Lake

Crow Lake deftly illustrates how a single choice can change the direction of not only an individual’s life, but the lives surrounding that individual as well.

The Pye men choose to hate their children (but keep having them?). Weird. I understand there is a cycle of abuse, and that a person tends to adopt the behaviors of those around them, but wouldn’t an abused child – knowing how it feels to be abused – want to stop the abuse rather than perpetuate it? SPOILER ALERT I was sure that Laurie Pye was going to kill his father, not the other way around. That took me by surprise. I think it was all the references to the fact that Laurie wouldn’t take crap from his father, that he stood up to him, etc. that led me to believe that Laurie would be the one to do harm - "As a child, Laure too had burned bright with swallowed rage, but when he was older, he did answer back. Oh, definitely, he did answer back," (page 117). "Calvin had never stood up to his own father, according to Miss Vernon. Laurie did. Laurie would not be cowed," (page 203). The choices of the Pye men led Marie to be in the vulnerable situation she was in (I think), which then led to Matt’s choice. What a tragic family.

Luke chooses not to go to university in order to keep his siblings together. Regardless of his motivations, this was an honorable, mature choice. I mean, he was what, 17? 18? Maybe he really didn’t want to become a teacher and that motivated him to stay home, but he still took on a lot of responsibility for such a young man. The people of Crow Lake were amazing - rallying around those kids the way they did. And I was impressed by Luke’s faith that everything would work out al right. Luke is also faced with another choice, witnessed by Kate. Sally McLean, that tramp, offered herself to Luke, but he chose to turn her down (compare with Matt’s behavior). And I don’t think it’s because Luke is gay –there were foreshadowings of a relationship between him and Miss Carrington. Amanda and I were talking about the book, and we both decided that, even though the book focused on the relationship between Matt and Kate, Luke was our favorite brother.

Matt chooses not to go to university and accept the consequences of his actions with Marie. That is an honorable choice – and he’s made his peace with it and is happy. Matt loves his son and I think he grew to truly love his wife. I think Matt’s only regret is the effect that his choice had on his relationship with Kate. His choice is the crux of the book – it instigates Kate’s choice.

Kate chooses to see Matt as a failure. She chooses to allow Matt’s choices warp her relationship with her favorite brother. And this choice causes her to shut herself off from any other meaningful relationships (kudos to Daniel for sticking with her). I will admit, when Kate had her epiphany of self-awareness, it prompted a much needed one for me as well. It’s never easy to analyze oneself, to really understand why you behave in a certain way – but it’s even harder to do something to change it, so kudos to Kate, too. Crow Lake ended much like The Kite Runner – not with a perfectly happy-ever-after ending, but with a hopeful ending.

On a lighter note, I love the two extra commandments - Thou Shalt Not Emote and Thou Shalt Not Admit to Being Upset.

Sorry!!!

Ugh! My apologies about the weird post. I have a different personal blog on blogger, and I inadvertently posted the comic entry on the wrong blog! Sorry!

Is this our book club?

I quite like the British sitcom The Vicar of Dibley. It's hilarious - even when I can't quite understand the accent. Anyway, Laurenda recently watched my two favorite episodes, The Handsome Stranger and The Vicar in White, and suggested I post this scene. The premise of the story is that a female vicar arrives at a small English village. Anyway, in The Handsome Stranger, Geraldine (the vicar) starts a village book club. Hilarity ensues.

Kite Runner

It was a painful and yet beautiful book. I too loved the perfect ending- life was not perfect but it was hopeful.

I actually thought Amir was a little hard on himself. He was a kid and he was reacting to influences out of his control in typical kid fashion. He was jealous of Hassan for reasons that he sensed but didn't understand or have enough knowledge to understand. His culture told him that Hassan was not a person but a slave. His father showed him different but also made him jealous because Hassan was everything his Father could have wanted in a son. There would have been sibling rivalry between them if they had both been legitimate- they might not have been friends at all then because of Amir's inferiority complex. They were able to have their strange friendship because of their situation. I got annoyed with Amir being cruel but his methods of cruelty were pretty mild- brotherly even- usually. He made up stories instead of reading the real words- stories that Hassan enjoyed. He flaunted his power a little but Hassan was good at standing up for himself subtly. He kept Amir from abusing his power too much(usually) by not reacting to his tauntings or simply offering his faithfulness and loyalty. My Mom used to tell my sister that my brother would stop taunting her if she didn't give him such a big reaction. Her reaction created all the fun. Hassan did this very wisely. Amir was a better person because Hassan showed Amir his faults simply by being Hassan.

It was hard to read about Hassan's abuse by Assef. It was hard to have Amir share in the shame without ever talking with Hassan about it. That was the worst- the months of non-communication and miscommunication. Later I think I was more mad at Rahim for not helping both of the boys through it. A child is not equipped to know how to deal with that kind of situation. Amir tried to avoid it and couldn't which is totally understandable. It was painful for him to set Hassan up and kick him out but based on later events I wonder if this was not better for him. Hassan escaped further abuse from Assef as a child. Based on the friend of Assef's who escaped at the same time as Amir and based on Hassan's murder- I think Hassan would have been terrorized continually by Assef if he had stayed there. Rahim said as much to Amir when he told him the story of his banished lover. Hassan was facing worse than Rahim's lover if he stayed and he had no one to protect him. I'm not sure that Amir could have done anything to protect Hassan in the streets from Assef. I'm not sure that even getting an adult would have done any good because he was too far from his father and most of the city did not consider Hassan person.
I thought it interesting that Assef was shown as the core of the Taliban- He being a man so impure and evil. It seems that was the nature of the movement- It professed to be one thing while in actuality it was another. It was a cover for hate and sin. It reminded me a lot of the Nazi reign of terror. Similar motivations and tactics.
I was proud of Amir for assimilating so fast the fact that Hassan was his half brother. That cannot have been easy. He spent so much of his life feeling inadequate and imperfect in his father's shadow. To suddenly discover his father was so imperfect(especially by his father's own standards) must have been very painful. He also showed bravery in taking the wife that he chose imperfect as she was. Amir was a better man than he gave himself credit for.